Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I (1)________ the kings of England
And I (2)__________ the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming (3)________ a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With (4)________ cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus
I know the (5)____________________ names of beings animalculous
In short, in (6)______________ vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (7)________ model of a (8)____________ Major-General
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I know our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer (9)________ acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous
I can (10)________ undoubted
Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I (11)________ the croaking chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of (12)__________ I've (13)__________ the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And whistle all the airs
From (14)________ (15)________________ nonsense Pinafore
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Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And (16)________ you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I know (17)________ is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more (18)________ at
And when I (19)________ precisely
What is (20)__________ by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics (21)________ a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been (22)______________ down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I (23)________ what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm (24)________ wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in (25)____________ gunnery
When I (26)________ more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a better Major-General has (27)__________ rode a horse!
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For my (28)________________ knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in (29)______________ vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
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