Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With many (1)________________ facts
About the (2)____________ of the hypotenuse
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I'm (3)________ good at integral and differential calculus
I (4)________ the scientific names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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I know our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a (5)____________ (6)__________ for paradox
I (7)__________ in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor (8)__________________________ parabolous
I can (9)________ undoubted
Raphaels from (10)____________ Dows and Zoffanies
I know the (11)________________ chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of (12)__________ I've (13)__________ the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And (14)______________ all the airs
From that infernal nonsense Pinafore
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Then I can (15)__________ a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And (16)________ you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (17)____________ Major-General
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In fact
When I (18)________ (19)________ is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What (20)________________ has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a (21)____________________ of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm (22)____________ and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know (23)________ is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser (24)__________ (25)________ a javelin
When such (26)______________ as sorties
And surprises I'm more (27)________ at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a better Major-General has never rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
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