Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a (1)____________ Major-General
I've (2)______________________ vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From (3)________________ to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the (4)____________ and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus
I (5)________ the scientific names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very (6)__________ of a modern Major-General
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I (7)________ our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a (8)____________ taste for paradox
I (9)__________ in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In (10)____________ I can (11)__________ peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels (12)________ Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I know the croaking chorus
From The (13)__________ of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've (14)__________ the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And whistle all the airs
From that infernal nonsense Pinafore
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Then I can write a washing bill in (15)__________________ cuneiform
And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser (16)__________ from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know (17)________ of tactics than a (18)____________ in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a (19)____________ Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my (20)________________ knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (21)____________ Major-General
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(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know (22)________ is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm (23)________ wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What (24)________________ has been made in modern gunnery
When I know (25)________ of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a (26)____________ Major-General has never rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
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