Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I (1)________ the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming (2)________ a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With (3)________ cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very (4)________ at (5)________________ and differential calculus
I know the (6)____________________ names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General
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I (7)________ our mythic history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox
I (8)__________ in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels (9)________ Gerard (10)________ and Zoffanies
I know the croaking chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've heard the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And (11)______________ all the airs
From (12)________ infernal (13)________________ Pinafore
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Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very (14)__________ of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I (15)________ what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can (16)________ at sight a Mauser rifle (17)________ a javelin
When such (18)______________ as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has (19)________ made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm (20)____________ and adventury
Has (21)________ (22)________ brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (23)________ model of a modern Major-General
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(One (24)________ time?!)
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In fact
When I (25)________ what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know (26)________ of tactics than a (27)____________ in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
You'll say a better Major-General has (28)__________ rode a horse!
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For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a modern Major-General!
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