Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk through the valley (1)__________ I (2)______________ my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's (3)________ plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know I shun fancy things like electricity

At (4)________ in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah feeds the chickens and (5)__________ plows, fool
And I've been milking and plowing so long that
Even Ezekial thinks that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you (6)____________ thine
Then tonight we're going to (7)__________ like it's 1699

We've (8)________ spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
I (9)__________ butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise
It's (10)________ work and sacrifice, living in an Amish paradise
We (11)________ quilts at discount price, living in an Amish paradise

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I (12)________ smiled at him, and I turned the (13)__________ cheek
I (14)____________ don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my head off when he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never (15)______________ a (16)______________ even if he (17)________________ it
An Amish (18)________ a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I (19)__________ wear buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the (20)__________ bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be

We've been spending (21)________ our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice, living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million (22)__________ as humble as (23)________ art

I'm the (24)____________ guy the little Amletts want to be like
On my knees day and night scoring points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or else my brother might (25)________ to get medieval on your hiney

We've been spending most our lives living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, living in an Amish paradise
There's no (26)________ or (27)______________ lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably (28)__________ it bites, living in an Amish paradise
Yeah

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