Amish Paradise by Weird Al Yankovic

As I walk through the valley (1)__________ I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish (2)________ me
You know I (3)________ fancy things like electricity

At (4)________ in the mornin' I'm milking cows
Jedediah (5)__________ the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've (6)________ milking and plowing so long that
Even Ezekial thinks that my mind is gone

I'm a man of the land, I'm (7)________ discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine
Then tonight we're going to party like it's 1699

We've been spending most our (8)__________ (9)____________ in an Amish paradise
I churn butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice, (10)____________ in an Amish paradise
We (11)________ quilts at (12)________________ price, living in an Amish paradise

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just (13)____________ at him, and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in (14)________ I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughin' my head off when he's burnin' in hell

But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude, you know that's unheard of
I (15)__________ wear buttons, but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really (16)________ good in black, fool

If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the (17)__________ bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just (18)______________________________ impaired

There's no phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be

We've been spending (19)________ our lives living in an (20)__________ paradise
We're just (21)__________ and simple guys, living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice, living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all (22)________ nice, living in an Amish paradise

Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise a nutter
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know, I'm a million times as humble as (23)________ art

I'm the pioust guy the (24)____________ Amletts want to be like
On my knees day and night scoring points for the afterlife
So don't be vain, and don't be whiney
Or (25)________ my brother might have to get (26)________________ on your hiney

We've been spending most our lives (27)____________ in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites, living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights, living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably (28)__________ it bites, living in an (29)__________ paradise
Yeah

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