Major-General's Song by Gilbert And Sullivan

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I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And I quote the fights historical
From (1)________________ to Waterloo, in (2)__________ categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial (3)______________ I'm teeming (4)________ a lot o' news
(Hmm, lot of news.... Got it!)
With (5)________ cheerful facts
About the square of the hypotenuse
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I'm very good at (6)________________ and differential calculus
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very (7)__________ of a (8)____________ Major-General
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I (9)________ our (10)____________ history
King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty (11)__________ for paradox
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous
I can tell undoubted
Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I know the croaking chorus
From The Frogs of Aristophanes
Then I can hum a fugue
Of which I've heard the music's din afore
(Ooh, din afore, din afore... Got it!)
And whistle all the airs
From that (12)________________ nonsense Pinafore
...
Then I can (13)__________ a (14)______________ bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
In short, in (15)______________ vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the (16)________ model of a modern Major-General
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can (17)________ at sight a (18)____________ rifle from a javelin
When such (19)______________ as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
(Oh, that's a hard one, strategy... Got it!)
You'll say a (20)____________ Major-General has never sat a-gee
...
For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (21)____________ Major-General
...
(One more time?!)
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In fact
When I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
When I can tell at (22)__________ a Mauser (23)__________ from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm (24)________ wary at
And (25)________ I know precisely
What is meant by "commissariat"
When I have learnt
What progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of (26)__________________ strategy
You'll say a better Major-General has never rode a horse!
...
For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the century
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a (27)____________ Major-General!
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